I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
