im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
they're like a gay fantastic four
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize