I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
