Porn is love you can see.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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