You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
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does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
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I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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