and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
