Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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