Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
