as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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