He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
