it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
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He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
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I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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