why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
