someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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