I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
