Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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