God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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