i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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