just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
