we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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