I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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