when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
