I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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