What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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