I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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