i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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