can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
