Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
