I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
