it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize