I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I wear drunk well.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
