Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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