What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
