Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize