I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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