Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I want to have your abortion
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
