Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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