TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
FUCK WHALES
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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