Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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