He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
