We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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