I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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