We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
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You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
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dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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