True but thats because hes a fetus.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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