Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
