He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
