Kiss
Puke
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
only you would photoshop your dick
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
