why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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