Those balls look pretty dangerous.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
