hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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