ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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